Let Me Repeat -- Wombs Are Not Clown Cars: Oh Nadya

I've avoided talking about Nadya Suleman and her 14 children for obvious reasons. This topic has been talked to death, and back to life again about 14 times, I would estimate. So, I had decided that nope, I would ignore it, pretend it didn't exist, wasn't important in my world, and discuss things that really matter, like whether or not I actually do put tomato soup in my meatloaf, or why Mr. Handsome wears a spelunker headlamp to bed.

But it's gotten the best of me, this Suleman character. I can't stand it anymore. I am breaking under the pressure of it all. And so I must discuss it, as is my duty as your Blogging Goddess. And besides, Dooce is talking about it. So, if the Almighty Dooce must discuss the issue, so must the Blogging Goddess. Such is the law.



Just in case you've been living in a cold cave in the middle of Zanzibar, the woman above is Nadya Suleman. That is, Nadya and her extremely rotund and egg-like, painful-looking belly, about one week before she popped out eight little premature, squawling humanlings.

Now, before I even get started, I want to make it perfectly clear that I do not know Nadya. Never met her and her lips. Not even close. So, really, I cannot judge this woman. But I will nonetheless, because if that's not my goal in life, I don't know what is. Needless to say, what I am going to say has probably already been said at least 1 gagillion times, so you may just want to skip over this entire post. Whatev.

First of all, I do not think Nadya having 14 children is wrong. Not at all.

What I do think is questionable is Nadya's decision to have 14 children, based on what we know about her and her lifestyle. The fact that she does not work, cannot afford the six she already had before the octuplets came, and lives with her mom is indication enough to me. She lives on less than $500 per month of food stamps, for god's sake.

People, what was she thinking?

I have the same issue with people who have more children than they can knowingly afford, and just assume it's okay because society will take care of all of them. Meanwhile, they go out and buy their cigarettes, watch their satellite tv, get take-out, and laugh at the rest of us who work our buns off trying to make ends meet, as well as pay for their bills. And it doesn't matter that the majority of the population doesn't know or even care where their hard-earned money goes in the end. What does matter is that Nadya consciously made this decision, and very very selfishly, I might add, to the obvious detriment of her children and everyone around her.

I'm not talking about "accidents" -- or shall we call them "surprises" because that is much more politically correct, although much more inaccurate -- because as we all know, accidents happen to the best of us.

I guess that's what I am having the biggest problem with in this whole drama. That, and the unyielding feeling that Nadya is doing this for money, not out of love. She hasn't come right out and said this (or has she?), but I get the sneaking suspicion this is very much behind the scenes. Oh, you know, book deals, a movie. Blahblahblah. I think she's had this all thought out.

She even has a website that says nothing about her or her family. There are only two links on her website: one for comments, the other for donations.

Come to think of it, I'd actually buy a book about how she got her lips to look like that. And then do whatever I had to do to NOT have that happen to me. I'd rather have my lips shrink with age like heated Saran wrap, thank you very much.

I don't think these children were conceived out of love for children, or even for the love of raising children and giving them love. I believe she's in love with the idea of having children. Very different scenario, and very dangerous on so many levels.

And while I'm at it, I also think she's loving the limelight. Kind of Britney Spearsish. I think she's lapping up the publicity, wants to be famous, and the only trick she had up her sleeve to get her there was by opening up her legs. Harsh, but true. Because really, what other talent does she have? Besides having really big, swollen and unnatural lips, that is.

I hope I'm wrong, but I don't think so.