I'm A Contendah

It's been a bit of a crazy few days, what with Mother's Day, exams and job interviews coming out my ears.

The weekend began with a sad message from Mr. Handsome's sister, who told us their beloved dog, Laker, had passed away. He was 12 years old, a pretty German Shepherd, and apparently his stomach had somehow inverted and he died. So sad. He was getting old, but it's always very sad when your pet passes away. We'd spent many holidays and long weekends with Laker, and we're going to miss him, especially Gryphon, who loved his cousin and still expects to see him. The cottage, where he spent all his summers, and the lake, after whom he was named, will miss him too.

I had multiple government exams all day Saturday, which isn't really the way anyone wants to spend a Saturday, as you could tell by the grimaces and groans as person upon person filed in, like cattle. I was so flustered that I left my insulated coffee cup on top of the car, and my cell phone at home, and that's after remembering to make sure I took it with me. That is how my day began.

The rest of the day was better, although some of the exams were damn difficult. At one point, I'm sure I uttered, "For Christ's sake," out loud more than once, because really, how many times can a person be asked to figure out which day falls before the third week of the tenth month after the second month with three holidays, which does not have either a "I" or a "U" in it? Yeah, exactly. Really. As if that would ever be anywhere in the realm of what I'd really be doing in the job. And if it was, I wouldn't last too long. My point being, why bother ...

My French language testing back in April apparently went well. I got my results, and received the equivalent of an A. Not so shabby (I just said that with a hard Jewish accent), especially with a raging migraine and nausea on board when I had taken the damn exam.

And then, I just had an interview on Monday for a real live job, and you know what, guys? I have a really good feeling about it. I should know today or tomorrow whether or not I am the lucky recipient of a regular cheque for the foreseeable future. I can see myself now, at my little cubicle, with my little coffeemaker in the corner, coffee percolating in the morning as I work away like a little busy bee. I'm quite excited about the prospect, and very nervous about the Big Unknown.

I have another interview today for a part-time, lesser-paying job, but a job all the same. As I tell myself all the time, "Poodle," I say, "it's not over 'til the fat lady sings." Whatever that means. Does anyone know? Because I'd really like to know.

And then, as if Simon Cowell looked down on me and proclaimed me to be the next world singing sensation (I've been hearing angels with heavy British accents singing to me all week), I got two more interviews this week! Who knew?! All four of the interviews this week are for medical establishments, which blows me away because I have no medical experience. Well, not professionally anyway.

Maybe these guys are all psychic, and know that I have visited pretty much every single hospital department there is, and even some that don't exist (except in my head). I am so well versed in all things medical, in fact, that I could probably cut someone open, take out their spleen, replace it with a homemade baggy filled with red gel, and close 'er up, and the patient would never know the difference.

You could say I'm an anomaly, in any sense of the word.

Anyway, like I said, crazy week, lots of schtuff to swill around in my mouth before I spit out something that makes some sense.