Please Stop The Screaming!

I really don't know what's wrong with me these past few days, but it's almost like a dark cloud is hovering over me, squeezing all my creativity out of my tiny little brain. It takes all I've got, and more martinis than I have olives, to squeeze out one little fart-like pippet of a blog post. So, today's post will be about the lychee fruit.



And the question I pose to you is this: Is it pronounced LEECHEE, or LICHEE? Please help me. And while I'm on the topic, how in hell's name does one do the "strikethrough" text on their blog? I cannot for the life of me figure this tiny detail out.

It's been a storm in this house since Dennis mentioned he wanted some lychee fruit. And since it's my month to get groceries, it's been up to me to get some. Of course, I haven't, but that's not the point.

Dennis and Milly are fighting over the damn pronunciation of the stupid fruit, that which I have never even tried in my entire life. In fact, I think it looks too much like overripe ovaries to be at all appetizing. Here, would you like this tasty, ripe, about-to-burst ovary?

Sure.

The children were introduced to the lychee fruit awhile ago by their amazingly erudite grandmother, who believes they are not taken care of well enough by their overbearing parents (that would be me and Mr. Handsome). Therefore, she continually barrages them with "new experiences", such as the lychee fruit, and jello shots. Just kidding. About the jello.

The problem is, our children have a severe allergy to the birch tree, which, in turn, has caused them to be very sensitive to a huge variety of fresh fruit and vegetables. They have what's called 'oral allergy syndrome', and it sucks big time because my kids are the best eaters I've ever seen, and for them to be forbidden to eat fresh fruit and veggies that they love is just horrid. Not only that, but it makes it a bitch to buy food for their school lunches. If they have, say, an apple, they will quickly break out into hives, their mouths will get itchy, their ears, etc. etc. etc. and then they complain bitterly, and I have to give them Benadryl before they stop breathing.

Anyway, lychee fruit apparently seems to be okay on their extremely sensitive systems. And I am glad Grandma discovered this fruit that my offspring are able to actually consume. Truly, I am.

Now I just need to know how to pronounce the damn thing so the screaming will stop!