Tripping

So, we're heading to Toronto for the weekend, sans Mr. Handsome, which some would say is a vacation in itself. Which is to say, Mr. Handsome *I* would say that. Not really.

Maybe.

We haven't seen Mr. Handsome's sister's baby "Oscar" in a few months, and that was when they came up here at Christmas time, which means we hardly saw them at all because we were all sick with  The Plague of Disney World and were, as a result, quarantined by the laws of Mr. Handsome's family. Also, Mr. Handsome's sister wanted us to come down to Toronto and babysit visit, so we're going. She's also pregnant AGAIN, so this is my chance to make fun of her ever-expanding body.

I'm taking Em, Dee and Gryphon with me (why yes, as a matter of fact, I do like horrific car rides), and we're leaving Friday morning and coming back Monday afternoon, which means that, not only am I missing Valentine's Day with Mr. Handsome, but also that I'm posting my usual Friday post today instead to screw with your heads because if I tried to post this on Friday, I'd probably screw it up royally since I'd be in the midst of packing the car and arguing with the kids and putting Mr. Handsome in his place, and I'd totally forget to hit "publish" until I was past Napanee, and then I'd get so upset I'd have to pull over at some roadside Wendy's and fill my face with square burgers and then I'd most probably forget one kid back at the roadstop bathroom, and we all know what a bitch it is to try and turn around on Highway 401 and get back to that spot again from the OTHER side of the highway, even if you wanted to.

The drive down is only a little over four hours, so it's no big deal. Unless, of course, you've got two children and a very large dog in the car with you, and the children think it's all fun and games to scream nasty words to one another, and the dog thinks he's a human and believes he should sit in the front seat, so he keeps sticking his rather large nose too close to your face, creating quite a problem when you attempt to slap a child in the head shoulder-check.

As an aside, lest any of you think it awful that Mr. Handsome and I won't be spending Valentine's Day together, it ain't no big deal, because V-Day is really a Hallmark Holiday, as we like to call it around here, and Mr. Handsome and I show our utter and complete love for one another every single day of the year.

I'm just hoping the storm that is enveloping the northern States in blizzardy snow doesn't affect the Toronto area too much because it's hard enough to expect me to be able to drive safely in good weather when I'm filled with medication and whatever alcoholic beverage I can get my hands on before we leave. People are so judgmental.

Miracles do not come easily, my dears.

I'll of course be bringing my laptop and my camera, and plan on putting up some amazingly professional photos of our weekend sometime next week. I won't even have to Photoshop them or edit them in any way, shape or form because I still don't know how to use Photoshop and am way too lazy for that kind of crap because they will be just THAT amazing.

UPDATE: Holy crap, Batman! Guess who just started following me on Twitter, guys! Fran Frackin' Drescher, that's who! You know, THE FAMOUS ACTRESS. Even MORE famous than Gowan, I'd have to say. Remember her, from The Nanny? What is happening here?! Am I more well known and desired than I think I am?! What does the world know that I don't know? Excuse me now while I go buy myself a boa.

Comments

You have a lovely week-end Mary, if anyone deserves a break you do.
I went to Spain 4 weeks ago came back a week later and went down with an awful cold so feel like I need another break to get over that.
I am coming to the States ( God Willing ) in June to Nashville
to see my favourite singer Daniel,
so will have to buy a cowgirl hat and not forget to take my tambourine with me.
Once again have a wonderful week-end. and enjoy.

Yvonne.
Holy crap, batman! Next thing you know, fellow hollywood types will see that Fran is following you and wondering why, and then before you know it the doors will be opened for you to have your own stand-up comedy act! And THEN, somewhere along the way, George Clooney will wonder what all the fuss is about, and he will want to check out your blog, and will see my famous comments, and before you know it I'll be leaving my husband to join him in Italy!

Well, in the meantime I hope you have a wonderful and safe trip. I think it's great that you're taking Griphon, as he needs a vacation sometimes as well.
GregoryJ said…
Four Hours?
You are a brave woman, Mary.
Are you taking some NyQuil or Benidryl?
I hope you have good weather and a wonderful time.

Does Mr. Handsome know where you have the nanny cam?
It sounds like the makings of a classic trip.
ReformingGeek said…
Wow! Brave woman.

Maybe a child or two could ride on top?

No really.

They have coats and hats and you have rope, right?

Make sure the pup is buckled up or in his car seat. ;-)

It's snowing cats and dogs here. Crazy.
♥Georgie♥ said…
LOL...gosh i love road trips with the kiddos-Hope you have a FAB weekend-ya'll drive safe!
okay how cool is that!!! Fran Drescher awesome!!!!
Jen said…
Good luck with that road trip. They never work out so well for me.

How cool is it that Fran is now following you. I think the biggest name I have following me is Ant from celebrity fit club.
WarsawMommy said…
Say hi to TO for me... my Mom is still there. Enjoy it - assuming the kids haven't driven you batshit CRAZY.
Wow! The Nanny? Following you? SWEET!! Congrats!
MarieA said…
HI FRAN! I LOVE you too. Not that I don't love you Mary, really. Smart show that Nanny sure was.
Twitter eh? I'd never have any followers let alone a Fran Drescher.

I am not worthy Mary, I bow before you oh comedic mom!

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