Epic Fail Ninja Stunts, And Why Volcanoes Suck

It would be just my luck to have our European getaway cancelled because of some silly volcanic eruption and a bit of spewing ash. When does it end, people? The conspiracy widens.

I mean, I've been growing my leg hairs out for the past two months (well, more) just so that I fit in with all the Europeans. And now we may not even be going. All that effort for nothing. Typical.

Is it just me, or do you find people often make a really big deal out of nothing? Yeah, that's what I thought. Sheesh.

On another note, I really scared myself on Friday. No, not because I looked in the mirror.

I decided to finally visit this relatively new Chinese grocery market in town because (a) I was curious and (b) I was hoping to find some cheap eats to take home for dinner, and hopefully something that would require simple unwrapping and throwing onto a plate. I'm nothing if I'm not classy. I call it Freedom Fridays. Yes, you can borrow my idea if you must. Just give me the appropriate credit, if you don't mind.

Anyway, I was not disappointed because, lo and behold, because I walked into the gargantuan building and noticed it was filled to the brim with everything Asian, including all-day dim sum plates, and a dinner for five for less than $20! Needless to say, I was pretty damn proud of myself when I walked out of there with a dinner.

What scared me, however, and made shivers go up and down my spine, were the roast octopus with their intact tendrils hanging for all the world to see (the only other place I've seen anything like it is in porn), and duck bills in sealed packages that were somehow supposed to make you want to buy them to eat, and little tiny duck feet that made me want to projectile vomit all over their nicely tiled floor.

Yes, I'll go back there, but only because the food is genuine and cheap, and I sometimes like to feel like I'm in a very foreign country, where people don't blink an eye when monstrous octopus bodies loom in front of their faces.

Now, onto important things...

Stuff I Did While Having My Portrait Painted

By A Famous, Yet Incognito, Artist

• an extremely important post regarding anxiety, approached scientifically
• epic fail ninja stunt, but totally expected
  
• uses for a zombie with spooky, non-directional eyeballs

 Things I saw elsewhere that you really should look at,

if you know what's good for you:

I've got nothing for you. I was too busy napping and doing biology homework this week to do any blog reading. I probably won't have anything next week either, because I'm in Toronto, and then I have a fundraiser to prepare for with my best friend Slut, and then I have to get ready for our never-happening trip to Europe.

Well, it's not like anyone reads this stuff anyway.