Holy Mackerel

We had an international incident here the other night. It does not bode well for our country. Nay, our world. Well, at least for my well-being, and sometimes, guys, that's all that matters. It was late evening. The kids were fast asleep. All was quiet. I had taken out my contact lenses, washed my face, and was ready for bed. And then, I heard it: The unmistakable wailing sound of Mr. Handsome singing to Gryphon...at midnight. So, of course I had to come downstairs. It was a rare "cute" moment for Mr. Handsome, and I wanted to experience it. It's often the only joy I get in our marriage. Once it was over, I got up to go back upstairs to bed, but I noticed that one of our recycling boxes was still out on our front lawn. It is normally Dee's job to put the garbage and recycling out and back in every week, but he had forgotten. So, I decided to do the right thing for a change and bring the box in myself. Being lazy and very stupid at the best of times, I decided...

So, as I mentioned very briefly and selflessly the other day , I totally saved a school (and probably the entire country) from definite demise, and I am now waiting patiently by the phone for the city to call and offer me an award or maybe even the Order of Canada because I obviously totally deserve it. Although, I'm pretty sure the city doesn't give out the Order of Canada. Well, they should. Let me explain. The other evening, I suddenly became very enthusiastic about going for a walk. Mr. Handsome, Em and Dee looked at me like I had finally gone over the edge (because they know that is totally going to happen, it's not a question of "if", it's a question of "when"), so I had to tone down the enthusiasm a wee bit and repeat myself so that I made it clear that I was totally serious. Then Dee pipes up that he'd love to go for a walk with me, after first getting a small nod from Mr. Handsome that he'd probably be okay going alone with me. S...

I've been thinking a lot over the past week or so about this potential trip to Switzerland with Mr. Handsome . And when I say thinking about it, I mean dreading it. But not in a bad way. Let me explain. Well, first of all, apparently now we don't know for certain that Mr. Handsome is going any longer. It's called government budget cutbacks, yo. He said he should know by the end of the week. Stupid government people. But if he gets the go ahead, I then have to figure out what to do. Because although I know I've said before that I've never been to Switzerland and would love to go to the land of the hosen, good beer and dark chocolate, I also now know about the Al Qaeda. Call me crazy. Why not? Most people do. Thing is, we've already seen them in action just last weekend with the pizza delivery WITHOUT THE CHEESY BREAD , so god only knows what else they could do. They're obviously VERY serious and mean business. It's spooking me out, guys, and I think I...

You'll all be very happy to know that there is no mention in today's post of my awesome neighbours! Can I hear a hooray for small miracles?! Amen. And you're welcome. Mr. Handsome went away for the weekend, leaving me and the kids alone.all.weekend.long. Yeah. Guess I could end the post right here. But I won't. Mr. Handsome gets invited to this "all men's" weekend every spring at his sister's husband's cottage up in the Muskokas , and of course, he goes. Very thoughtless of him, if you ask me. And gender biased. Anyway, it sounds extremely boring because I asked him what exactly all the guys do up there for three days, and he looked at me like I was the stupid one, and said, "Poker." So I said, "You play poker for three days straight?" and he said, "Yeah," as if it was a totally normal and not obscene and very boring thing to do. And then he added, as an afterthought, "Well, we intersperse it with some x-box,...